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Posts Tagged ‘Blogging’

It’s time to get serious. I have been writing on and off quite a bit. I have four or five novels in the works, none of which I’m working on nearly enough and none of which are anywhere close to finished, but they’re all good in their own right and I have goals. I want to be a novelist. I want to write for a living. It’s important to me to get there.

And I’m fat again. It’s mostly not my fault. The weight I gained over the past few years was a direct result of my birth control, but now that I’ve had that removed, I need to take control and lose it. I started out well with that yesterday. I planned a full day of healthy eating and I walked and jogged more than four miles after work. Then I went to a friend’s house and ate this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And this morning, I nearly got sick in the shower (if you’ve ever experienced morning sickness, it felt like that) and then a pair of pants that fit me fine last year wouldn’t even come close to buttoning. Yeah. That happened.

But no worries because even before the truffle/cheesecake incident, during my workout, I had formed a plan in my mind. I am going to remedy all my woes.

First, I will go to the gym three times a week to lift weights. On the days I go to the gym, I will do some sort of cardio exercise to round out a full hour and on the days I don’t go, I will do a full hour of cardio. I will also do at least thirty minutes of yoga every day. I will write for a minimum of one hour per day and I will read a book each week. I mean, I started the book review blog before my surgery and I feel like I wrote two great reviews and was on a roll and then … I stopped. And that isn’t OK with me. I have big plans for that blog. It has a theme and a purpose and it’s pretty. It’s time to get serious.

 

 

 

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Because I’m a glutton for punishment, I decided to start a second blog. The idea came to me Monday night and yesterday, I signed  on to Wordpress and made it a reality.

I won’t be posting a link because the blog is private, but I wanted to write about it because my reasons are important.

When I started this blog, I intended it to be just mine. I was going to use it specifically to practice writing, to exercise those muscles. I initially told only a select few people (mostly fellow writers) about it. But it kind of got away from me and has turned into something different. That’s not a bad thing, but I still need that place to practice. The majority of my posts here are along the lines of friendly conversations/newspaper editorials. I give opinions, talk about funny or interesting things that have happened, post cute pictures or YouTube videos. I interact with friends, family and other bloggers.

It’s fun. I don’t intend to stop. But I also edit myself here. I won’t write about things that are too personal or about others, even if those things affect me in a way that I need to write about. I do this out of respect for others who may not want their business out there. And also because sometimes I just need to vent somewhere and not have it put out there in the world for everyone to see.

I was never good at journaling. I had a couple diaries of one type or another through my life, but never kept up with them, even though it’s something I’ve always wanted to do. My new blog will become that journal I always wanted. I decided that every day, I will write about what happened, even if I didn’t even get out of bed (this never happens). It will be something to look back upon and reflect, to remember my daily life. And I will use it to vent feelings in a safe place.

This is a way to keep me writing even when I have nothing important to say. I won’t feel guilty for boring people with my ho-hum moments and I can still keep up this place, which forces me to think and be a little creative in order to add something new every single day. If you look back over December and November, you will see a post every day except one. I’m pretty proud of that, since I was pretty inconsistent for a while!

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The old me who will soon be the new me

It’s November 30. With this post, I have completed NaBloPoMo. The irony is, I wasn’t participating. I didn’t even know about it until I think last week when I saw it mentioned on a couple blogs I came across. I didn’t set out this month to post every day, but I did.

I did not, however, complete any of the goals I’ve actually set for myself through the course of the past year. In a month, it will be New Year’s Eve and time to set some resolutions for 2010. Not that I ever set resolutions, but I think this might be my year.

A list of my failures:

  • Read a minimum of one book per week.
  • Write a minimum of one hour per day.
  • Cut WAY back on television (I have cut back a little, but I still fall back on it when I’m tired or bored or lazy).
  • Diversify what I cook and eat, and cook something new every week.
  • Stay off the computer 90 percent of the time while I’m home.
  • Pay off my debt (or at least pay it down).
  • Lose the rest of the weight and finally hit goal (I gained back 10 pounds instead).
  • Exercise a minimum of one hour per day average, no matter what.
  • Win NaNoWriMo (I have fewer than 10,000 words as of November 24).

Yep. I suck. And I wish I could say I really, really tried any one of those things, but honestly, I didn’t. They were always in the back of my mind, but I managed to justify not doing each and every one of them one way or another. This has to stop. I need to stop fearing failure. I need to stop making excuses. I need to just do it (see last Thursday’s post).

I’m not waiting until January 1, 2010. I’m starting now. Today. This is the end or procrastinating and dreaming but never doing. I’m committed and that’s that.

Luckily, there is some good news in all of this: I seem to have moved past my writing block. I have learned to just write. To stop listening to that voice in the back of my head telling me it isn’t good enough. To stop rewriting and just push through. I can revise. I can get feedback. I can do this. It may take longer than 30 days, but it will take less than a year. I vow this to myself. I need it. I am suffocating in my life and getting published, or the prospect of getting published, will give me hope. And if I’m lucky, freedom.

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